Hospitality Starts Before Hello
What makes a church feel welcoming?
We might think of coffee, conversation, a friendly handshake, or a familiar face waiting at the door. Those things matter, but true hospitality begins long before we sit down for fellowship. It starts in the parking lot, at the entrance, in the hallway, and in every interaction someone has along the way.
We can ask ourselves:
- Can someone easily find the entrance, restrooms, and other important spaces?
- Are signs clear, visible, and easy to understand?
- Do we greet people without assuming whether they are visitors, longtime members, or somewhere in between?
- Do we notice when someone might need help without making them feel singled out?
- Are we willing to introduce ourselves and start a conversation with someone we don’t know?
- What assumptions might we be making about the people we meet?
Sometimes, hospitality means simply changing the way we begin a conversation. Instead of asking, “Are you new here?” we might say, “It’s good to see you today!” or “How are you?” This gives everyone an opportunity to connect without putting them in a category.
Hospitality also means being thoughtful about the assumptions we make about someone’s identity. We may not know someone’s gender, family situation, abilities, background, or faith journey simply by looking at them. When we’re unsure about someone’s pronouns, using they/them can be a respectful way to speak about someone without making an assumption. If someone uses different pronouns, they can let us know.
At Church of the Apostles, we talk about being a church Where Welcome Grows. That welcome isn’t just something we offer at the door. It is something we practice in the small moments that happen throughout our shared life together.