Valuable Conversations

This past week I read “The Golden Rule” to the preschoolers.

What I appreciate so much about the author’s take on it is that it invites our imagination to consider all the ways to apply it. It helps us define what we could do for others that would be helpful, thoughtful, and kind.

We can live asking ourselves and others, “Is this a loving response?” A loving response does not mean pacifying, because we can even say challenging things lovingly.

This is why this season, we are inviting you to “Press Pause & Listen.” There is currently an attempt to overwhelm us with chaos so that we will either opt to check out of the news completely or reduce our consumption to that with which we agree, which makes us feel safe and comfortable.

I am saying something different. I want you to look at how you are consuming news and choose a less reactive mode – a different station, listening rather than viewing, reading rather than listening or viewing – and spending less time with it. And with the time you aren’t watching news or the chaos of the moment, sit in silence – pray – talk or connect with those that matter most to you.

Practice being the love you want to see in the world!

I came across this artist’s rendering of John 4:5-30 by Henryk Siemiradzki, which surprised me, and I want to share it with you.

As you think of the conversation between Jesus & the Samaritan Woman, is there anything in the rendering that surprises you?

I also remember three years ago when Jonathan preached this passage, and he surprised me when he argued, against contemporary scholarship, that the woman was actually an influencer within the community, or the people would not have listened to her. He also argued over the interpretation that she was a prostitute because it does not say that.

What it says is that she has had 5 husbands. Whether she had been divorced a lot, which was not that common, or was a very unlucky widow, is not known. This picture would suggest a widow who has gained wealth through her marriages.

Regardless of her background, Jesus is willing to break the societal boundaries by engaging her in conversation as an unaccompanied woman, and a Samaritan who was considered an enemy of the Jews from Jerusalem. Actually, the Samaritans were also Jewish, but they were descendants of the Northern Kingdom, while Jesus and his disciples were Jewish from the Southern Kingdom. The Northern Kingdom’s perceived “sin” was associating with the Assyrians, allowing intermarriages, and their pagan gods to be worshiped alongside the true God.

Now, to add some contemporary context, the Northern Kingdom’s capital was Shechem and later called Sychar, the site of our scripture passage. Today, this is located in the Balata village, a suburb of the Palestinian city of Nablus in the West Bank. Shall we say that feelings run long and deep?

And in our scripture passage, Jesus challenged those feelings 2,000 years ago. This scripture also shows how Jesus treated women with respect and invitation.

As part of honoring Women’s History month, I want to share with you a message from the  President & General Minister of our denomination – the United Church of Christ.

So where does this leave us today?

Well, I’m inviting us to consider the “valuable conversations” that we need to have with others. In the Come Sunday, I asked, “In your life, who could you approach more thoughtfully?”

But before we approach these conversations, we have to be in the best frame of mind. We need to regulate ourselves, which is to calm our fight or flight tendencies. This is also “Pressing Pause & Listening.” We can do so by:

• Focused deep or square breathing
• Checking in with our 5 senses
• Prayer
• Movement (walking, dancing, swimming)

This calms our anxiety so we can access our best thinking rather than just reacting. In recent times, there has been a lot of reacting rather than responding. Again, as before, this does not mean agreeing, but it does include being curious enough to ask questions about how another understands something and share, not as much our position, but the reasoning behind our thinking.

If we talk about the world we want to leave our children and grandchildren, it changes the conversation. When we share our values – even the Golden Rule – it can change the conversation to be respectful.

Our country is based on the ability to have creative disagreements, understanding that we are in this together, appreciating the value of “others,” holding tension in life-giving ways, and respecting each person’s voice and agency.

May we embody this as we live and build God’s Beloved Community.

May it be so. Amen.

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